Chef Boyardee and the Justice League: No meatballs for girls

What do my kids eat these days? Buttered noodlesEggo waffles. The occasional Wonder Woman sandwich. Mac & cheese. Quesadillas. McGriddles (yeah, we got back together with McDonald’s).

It’s a limited menu, and I’m always looking for ways to mix it up. Lucky for us, the Justice League of America has joined forces with Chef Boyardee to bring us Super Hero Shapes pasta!

And it’s not just Batman, Superman and the Flash. Joining the fight against boring pasta shapes are Supergirl, Batgirl and Wonder Woman (cue that awesome theme music from Batman v Superman). Good luck finding a female superhero on a Marvel food product.

We snapped up several cans when we first saw these at the grocery store, mostly the ones featuring Batman but also Supergirl and Wonder Woman. That’s when I noticed the weird difference between the “boy” and “girl” cans. Continue reading Chef Boyardee and the Justice League: No meatballs for girls

Watch my kids grow up in a supercut of my Vine videos

I never got around to blogging about Vine, Twitter’s service for making and sharing 6-second videos that loop endlessly. I meant to recommend it to parents as a way to capture moments with their kids, sort of like the moving photographs in Harry Potter.

Parents have plenty of other options now, like Instagram video, Apple Live Photos and the new Vine Camera for Twitter, but the old Vine is going away. For posterity, I downloaded all my old Vines and smashed them together in a big supercut on YouTube. I added some titles to help with context.

What I got was a vaguely arty 27-minute film about the last four years of my life. The best part, of course, is watching my kids grow up.

Continue reading Watch my kids grow up in a supercut of my Vine videos

Instagram: Wonder Woman sandwich

The Hobbit just started going to preschool, and she asked me to cut her peanut butter and honey sandwich into a Wonder Woman shape. Using only an IKEA steak knife, this is what I made on my first try.

I need to work on my humblebrags.

She ate almost the whole thing, which is a big win. And yes, she’s allowed to bring peanut butter to class.

Also, if you like the new DC Super Hero Girls toys, you might still be able to buy the Comic Con-exclusive Katana action doll at Matty Collector. Save her for Christmas. Or just keep her in the package forever.

No sleep till chow mein: A tweet of the Dad

As a parent, you feel like you’ve worried about everything. You haven’t. You never even thought to worry that your kindergartner would steal your car. I may have to rethink my endorsement of napping.

This could happen anywhere, but I had to throw in #PureMichigan because I never had the good sense to joke about Pure Michigan when I was covering the news in Michigan.

Batman v Superman: Why I’m bringing my 4-year-old

Batman won’t take his youngest son to see Batman v Superman: Dawn of Justice.

“Four years old is a little young to see this whole movie,” Ben Affleck told the Associated Press. “I don’t want him to have nightmares.”

My 4-year-old son already has a ticket to the movie. With the opening-night crowd. On the biggest movie screen in the state. In brain-exploding IMAX 3D. Go big or go back to the Batcave, I always say.

You might be thinking I’m a terrible parent and an even worse moviegoer. Maybe you think I’m the kind of narcissistic father who presumes his own little Batman fan to be cooler than Samuel Garner Affleck. I don’t think I’m any of those things. Here’s why the Champ has earned his ticket. Continue reading Batman v Superman: Why I’m bringing my 4-year-old

Breaking up with McDonald’s breakfast

We had a nice little McDonald’s breakfast routine going. Every week, on the way to the kids’ swim lessons, we would drive thru a neighborhood Micky D’s and eat in the car.

I would get a McGriddles sandwich combo and give the drink, always a chocolate milk, to one of the kids. Then I’d order a second chocolate milk and four orders of McGriddles cakes (“just the bread”). Big kid gets his milk in the jug while I expertly pour the little one’s into a Tupperware sippy cup. I bring my own water and a Monster to drink. I had it down to a science.

The good folks at my neighborhood McDonald’ses, not so much. I think maybe they’re not equipped to handle off-menu ordering. Probably my fault for violating the traditional combo structure.

Whatever the case, they never seem to get that I’m ordering four two-packs of McGriddle cakes (the kids just call them “pancakes”). It happens again and again that I leave the drive-thru light on McGriddles. Continue reading Breaking up with McDonald’s breakfast